Can you love deeply while practicing non-attachment?
Lately, I've been dabbling in some Buddhist readings (only from secondary sources and without any understanding of translation nuances, so my understanding may be inaccurate and is rudimentary at best.
I've been pondering on the teaching that attachment causes suffering; this idea brings me a great deal of comfort, but also stirs in me a lot of questions.
It brings comfort because life is so much easier to traverse when you can accept that everything is impermanent and everything will eventually pass. This resonates with what I observe of life. It is easier to enjoy, savour and experience everything that life has to offer, without white-knuckling and wanting to possess and/or win at everything.
In another sense, I have questions about how to reconcile being deeply loving and invested in the life of others (particularly my children), while practicing the same degree of non-attachment. While I understand that the word 'attachment' is a poor translation of the original word that was used in the teachings, and some say that the word 'clinging' in the English language is perhaps closer, I still find it difficult to visualise what it looks like in practice.
I would love to read about how others apply this in their lives. How we can love deeply while practicing non-attachment, and how we can hold both in our hands.
Does it mean unconditional love? That you love the whole person / being no matter what choices they make, or what path they venture down? Does it mean a relinquish of control? (Reminds me of the book gardener and the carpenter by Alison Gopnik that I've been wanting to read!)
Does it mean understanding that our children are never really 'mine' or my husband's to begin with, and that I'm simply blessed to do this version of life at this particular point in time, in this universe, with them?
Perhaps a rabbit hole I will willingly venture down.